From the sometimes occupied news desks of the IOTA news team, covering issues that America does not care about, Two Hoots, or One IOTA!
In a not-so-surprising, but ridiculous move, the Supreme Court Justices, today once again overturned centuries of law and precedence, dating back to Sir Isaac Newton and gravity, ruled that “Henceforth up shall be considered down.” I
In a case brought by the Union of Upside Down Advocates for Standing Inverse – UPSYDASI, a splinter group of STUPID, The Society of Teachers for Up Is Down, not to be confused with the Teachers Society for Ups and Downs.
UPSYDASI attorneys said, “Today is a great day for the intellectually challenged in our society and has been a long time coming. It’s a great win.”
In a more surprising move the decision was handed down as 5 – 0 rather than the customary 5 – 4, 6 – 3, 7 – 2, 8 -1, or 9 -0 decision as the five right leaning (that is politically right and has nothing to do with “correct”) judges appointed by the Federalist Society decided to have a little fun with the other jurists and, while on lunch, the five Federalists sneaked up the back stairs of the court house, locked the doors and created some new law!
The sneaky, cleaver, Fun-living Five were about to hand down other decisions including cases that would allow MAGA’s to designate, when needed, official electoral college ballots, the right of corporations to hire for half of minimum wage, 8 year olds for farm labor, and a law that would make it legal for designated justices to take bribes from Monday through Thursday during business hours, and lastly, making the Federalist Society a part of the Federal government.
These decisions were set aside when Justice Sotomayor was able to bust down the locked door with a couple of good shoulder bumps.
It was reported that Sotomayor said “WTF???? Is wrong with you people?”
These and other decisions still to come are brought to you by the Federalist Society of Russian and American shared values!
